Your Goals as an Actor: Are They Hurting or Helping You?

You know those New Years resolutions you wrote up on January first?  Are you keeping to them or is that one of those topics we're going to shy away from quickly?  If you've kept to them, I applaud you, because most people have a hard time keeping their new years resolutions and the brutal truth is, the ones that KEEP them, often don't feel the relief or sense of accomplishment they were hoping for.

Is that you at all?

I hope you're wondering why it IS that way.

So glad you asked... it's what I want to write to you about.  (wink)

The problem with just plain old goal setting is that it only addresses the surface of the problem or need.  Beneath the goal lies a deeper need for fulfillment; a desire and deeper feeling that longs to be met.

Stay with me of the idea of desire.  Why do you shower in the morning?  You may answer, "Well, to be clean, of course!"  Yes, we all shower to be clean, but WHY do we want to be clean?  You can say,  "Because I won't smell, people will talk to me and it makes me feel refreshed and ready to work!"  Ok.  I totally hear you.  But what you're really telling me, is that you have a desire to be confident and approachable and showering is one of the roads or tools that takes you toward that desire.

See where I'm going with that?

If you have a goal to pay off all your debts, buy a new car and land your first movie script this year, that puts a lot of situational stress on you and causes you to throw in the towel. OR you may find yourself SO committed that you become stressed and loose your life quality to some goals that you don't even have the full say in.  What if you took that current (possibly wrinkled and dusty) New Years Resolution List out and made a column next to it that listed the deeper wants of those things....  then go deeper and deeper.

Let's make a sample list to get the idea:

pay off all debts: WHY? The money stresses me, I want better credit and to feel like I can start saving money, not paying everyone else...  WHY? It will free me up to do what *I* want with my money. OH.  You desire to feel FREE.

land the movie: WHY?  Cause I've been acting so long and I'm tired of the same old things! I'm talented and want to be successful! WHY?  Because I know I'm good enough and want people to recognize that.  OH.  You want to feel WORTHY.

loose 15 pounds: WHY?  Because I'm getting old and that doesn't help.  I want to fit in to my clothes and show up to auditions and look good.  WHY?  Cause it feels good to look good and I'll be more... OH.  You want to FEEL GOOD & CONFIDENT. 

So, you see where this is going but here's where I'm going to throw in the plot twist.

That's easy.

If your list has turned into 2014 being filled with doing things that make you FEEL GOOD, WORTHY,  FREE and CONFIDENT...  and you ran your daily choices by those feelings to keep you on track, who knows what you are capable of?

(note:  You won't always feel good; sometimes fulfilling our work responsibilities don't always feel good, but accomplishing them does.  So either stick to THAT feeling or be aware that maybe your body wants a different job or to do something that feels good in a better more efficient way.  If you have to convince yourself that you will eventually feel good - you may be putting your blinders on)

Before, you chose to loose 15 pounds.  What about when you reached 15?  Then what?  That's when most people reach their goal and find 'keeping it off' as a new goal they just can't stick to.  But when you commit to feeling good and confident, you give yourself the freedom to make healthy choices daily, because you are daily reaping the reward for commitment.

Landing a part in a movie puts you at the mercy of other's judgement with the added stress of comparing you to others.  And this doesn't make you unworthy.  It simply means you're one fish in a pond of many.  (many fish who are all stressing and desperate for that part)  If you really focused feeling worthy or even accomplished, you'd be surprised how often you'd meet that desire at it's longing point.  Get up out of bed?  Take care of your responsibilities?  Go to that acting class you wanted to attend?  Audition?  Be in that Commercial?  If you say YES to those things, you are DOING. And when you embrace being WORTHY and ACCOMPLISHED then you will be proud of yourself. You will give yourself approval (not wait for other's) and ultimately, you'll stand out in that pond as the fish that shines brighter and swims more smoothly.  THAT, friend, is your secret weapon in getting further in your career.

We only want you to succeed and if you want more, let us at The New York Acting School for Film and Television, know how we can help you succeed and your dreams.